Saturday, January 31, 2009

Isn't this the trip of a lifetime? Jesus, I can't believe what my life is like. No one can know how their life will move and I certainly had no idea as what my life would be like, but what fortune and luxury to be able to go places I'd never envisioned seeing and then being able to come home. Honestly, even being in constant amazement every waking moment up here, it's been very, very difficult without Lynn Bloom. I pray for telepathy.

While Alaska is otherworldly in many ways, something makes sense to me here. I have the conviction and some of the fortitude of the Alaskan “pioneer” in the way I like to move about in the world, going where I want... but up here I know that people lived here for thousands and thousands of years before “pioneers” cut teeth and there's nothing that someone else hasn't seen and claimed before. And there's a sort of yearlong schizophrenic cycle where cabin fever and white line fever flow right into each other and the balance seems compelling. Although I know as a visitor, not a resident, it's a dangerous thing to balance and I can't really speak to it.

For this trip I made a conscious decision to not work as I usually do, which is full throttle working all day, every day. Well, actually, I'm working all day, every day but in a different manner, using the camera in a different way, with almost all of my shots experimenting with shooting in a different style, and looking to really take in what I'm seeing.

Everything is interesting here and it's impossible to not think about geology and geography, evolution and migration, and ideas about land ownership. Everything leads to something else and it can be distracting... the spice route, manufacturing and consumption, mortality, morality, and love.

I flew over the Alaskan Interior yesterday knowing a massive mountain range is right underneath me, but because it was obscured by clouds it was a leap of faith believing it was there. For all I know, underneath the tip of Denali that jut through the clouds could be the strip malls of Wasilla. But I believe that it was the Alaska Range underneath me because I'm a believer.

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